So, I have had a great day. Booked a day off. Been basically relaxing at my partners house – coffee breaks a little bit of study for by counselling course, more coffee and a lovely chat with his mum. All. Is. Good.

And then………. I saw Facebook Time Hop.

It is 8 years ago today since my beautiful boy arrived to his forever home. But he is not currently here, is his off having amazing adventures with his dad.

Of course I am sad, but the realisation that I had actually forgotten the date was worse. How could forget the day my baby came to me. It’s not a birthday afterall, but you could argue it is a date more significant. I would never forget his birthday, but this day almost passed me by.

And, in a flash my day went from amazing to so sad and I have spent the last two hours thinking about my reaction, how I can ease it and how I can make it better.

How can I make a reaction to something better? I have reflected, I have sat in the moment and nothing has taken away my sadness. However, I have realised that as soon as my sadness appeared I retreated away from the people I know can make me feel better.

I made some texts to those away from me, and I am about to leave my screen and go to those downstairs who are near me.

At the end of the day we need love, people and non-judgement.